We are the parents of a 16 year old girl that wants to date a 19 year old boy. We don't want them to date and we just found out that they have been sneaking around and lying to us for the last 6 months, dating anyway. We have told them that they cannot see each other anymore and our 16 year old has been grounded. Do we have the right to keep them apart, or does state law say they can choose because she is 16. Can we file charges against him if they keep trying to date?

In the State of Washington under most circumstances, it would NOT be a criminal sexual offense for a 19 year old to be engaged in a sexual relationship with a 16 year old minor (unless this is a State employee in the educational or correctional system.) The legal age of consent in Washington is 16.

That said, this does not mean the 19 year old could not be held legally accountable for other activities and influences over the 16 year old minor. The parents have full legal authority over the minor's activities; the 19 year old (as a legal adult) has NO legal rights to override the authority of the parents.

As parents of the 16 year old, you are legally responsible for the care, welfare and control of your minor child until she reaches the age of 18. If the 19 year old puts your minor child "at risk" there are other legal actions that may be initiated to prevent contact even if the minor resists or does not cooperate.

What does "At Risk" mean? Generally speaking, if the 19 year old is contributing to the 16 year old's delinquency by encouraging destructive or unlawful behavior such as, truancy, running away, alcohol use, cigarettes, drug use, sexual exploitation, prostitution, etc... any of this, it should be reported to police and if the behavior continues, there may be sufficient grounds to request a restraining or protective order against the 19 year old, which would make it "illegal" for him to have contact with her. Generally, violation of a court order means jail time.

These are things that are under the control of local law enforcement and often subject to available city/county resources rather than state resources. You would need to contact your local district attorney or police to understand what actions can be taken immediately to prevent escalation or further risk to the minor. It may be wise to seek legal representation in the matter.